2 entries in a day! I was thinking about writing everything in one, but I thought I should separate my fan-girlyness from the seriousness.

Today I went to the salvation army. It was my first time going to a thrift store. It was really interesting. For some reason, it made me kind of sad, and I reflected on myself. I’m kind of spoiled, but not really. A lot of people think that I am rich and spoiled, and that I get everything I want since I have a car and all. People think I only buy expensive clothes and products. Yeah, I do have brand named products, but not everything I own is branded. All the “expensive” things that I do own, I didn’t ask my parents to buy them for me (besides my car). I saved up the money to buy them. The economy has been really bad, so that means less money for my parents and less money for me, especially since I don’t have a job. I have become extremely stingy/frugal. I can’t even spend $10 without feeling bad. I wish money grew on trees, so I can go money-picking everyday haha.

Going to Salvation Army today, I just felt weird because I couldn’t imagine buying something that someone else has previously worn. It made me question myself if in fact I am really spoiled. I saw a huge class difference in Syracuse. On campus, everyone appears to be so rich and spend money so easily. I try not to use money at all because I don’t want to burden my parents financially. At the thrift store, people were doing all their shopping there because they can’t afford it anywhere else. It made me so sad. I have always wanted to be rich, or not rich just well-off, but what if I get a low-paying job and become “poor.” Could I live like them? Could I even get to live like I am right now?

It just makes me realize how thankful I should be for everything that I have. Not just the materialistic things, but for family, friends, a place to live, education, being able to worship God whenever. I wish I can be able to tell God how thankful I am for his love to me, even though I don’t think I can ever grasp how big it is. I wish I can love God instead of running away and sinning. There’s a lot of things in this world that make me sad, but there’s only really one thing I can do, which is to pray.

Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Psalm 107:1
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.


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